MORE FAQS (AUGUST 1997)

Q:  Why do you post these questions?

Short answer:  My door. I'll use it how I want.
Long answer:  Because I'm pretty much working alone, I often am doing tasks which cannot be bookmarked. So, by reading these, you with any luck, will have some of your questions answered without having to put up with my pissy attitude. This new one is due to frequently asked questions not covered in the old FAQ sheet.

Q:  So, it's the end of June. Why are you not opened?

Short answer:  'Cause.
Long answer:  In each life there is a certain amount of uncertainty. Often events and complications occur that cannot be avoided, thus prolonging anticipated events. In other words, because I ain't got all the work done yet.

Q:  So when will you be open, then?

Short answer:  Yes.
Long answer:  Since we have agreed to host the Da Vinci Days Animation Festival, it would be right handy to be open by the middle of July. Since the Da Vinci Days people have the power to help expedite "things", the middle of July is looking very good.

Q:  Why are you opening this theater?

Short answer:  I'm in it for the babes.
Long answer:  I'm in it for the money.

Q:  Really?

Short answer:  No.
Long answer:  Nope.

Q:  If this door is open, can I come in?

Short answer:  If I'm expecting you.
Long answer:  If I'm not busy, I'd love to answer questions. If you don't know construction site etiquette, don't come tromping in. You might get hurt, or worse yet, hurt me (The rudest thing I've had happen so far is someone tap me on the shoulder while I was cutting plywood with a power saw. He never got a chance to tell me what he wanted. Police are still investigating, so don't tell. That's when the barricade went up).

Q:  Is there anything I can do to help you get opened sooner?

Short answer:  Slip tens and twenties under the door.
Long answer:  No, but thank you for asking. The best thing anyone can do for any new business is get the word out and make suggestions on how YOU think this place should be run. Even if I laugh at you.

Q:  I want to know how much tickets are going to be!

Short answer:  That's nice.
Long answer:  Ticket prices are not some arbitrary number I pick out of my head like I'm playing the lottery. It will be based on what this place needs to gross to pay the bills. That number cannot be calculated until more inspections have been passed. At this time it's hovering around five bucks a head for full-priced shows. I suspect I'll also apply a sliding scale based on how much I like you. See old FAQ sheet, too.

Q:  Who writes your material?

Short answer:  A small troll who lives in the rafters.
Long answer:  The guy you'll be giving your money to when you come here to spend lots of it.

Thank you for the support and encouragement so many of you have shown.